Native Fire Star: 2014

Saturday, December 27, 2014

The Country Fox... Part 2 !

The Country Fox (Part 1), Click here

Earlier this year I wrote a blog entry entitled "The Country Fox". The link to that entry is listed above. Well... Now, I have well passed the mark of the 2nd half of my life. The feeling that I have always had for a Quiet Traditional Country Life is continuing to grow within me.

Sometimes I wonder if I really had an advantage by living in Big Cities all these years or if it was simply a FALSE "BLIND HANDICAP". Living in big cities sometimes can make you feel falsely invincible. You tend to think you have everything you need at your disposal. But, do you really...? The things that you think are assets, may actually be the very things that are holding you back in life, as a comfortable crutch. We now live life in a 24 hour, fast paced, instant gratification type of modern society. Things tend to happen and change in the blink of your eyes.

Remember that a FAST LIFE is NOT always GOOD LIFE ! There is a HUGE DIFFERENCE. I think today, we all have had things going so fast for so long now, that we have lost the ability to slow down and really appreciate what life truly has to offer us. And the sad part is, things are now moving so fast in today's society that we are practically on "Auto-Pilot". Most people are unaware that life is actually just passing them by... By the time most people realize it, they are too old to make their life count for what they originally once stood for, if they can even remember what that once was...?

Noise, Traffic, Crowds, Processed "Fake" Foods, Crime, Drugs, Alcoholism, Family Disfunction, Anger, Mental Illness, Pollution, Lost Family Values, Lost Traditions, No Manners, Misguided Behavior, Sexual Deviant behavior, Deranged Violent Youth, Lost Christian Teachings, Heartlessness, Selfishness, Broken Marriages, Broken Family Homes, Over Population, High Co$t of living, Lack of Community and Unity... ALL the ingredients of today's BIG CITY LIFE. (Note: 90% of all that, is closely credited to the heavy media influence of Hollywood and Poorly Valued Musicians) Well, All I can say is...

NO THANKS !

I am now aggressively seeking to break away from all that is associated with "City Life". I deeply desire to finally achieve the Quiet, Peace Loving COUNTRY LIFE that I have always dreamed of. As I said in Part one of "The Country Fox", A picture is worth a thousand words. So..., Here are just a few images of what I think we are all missing out on. Please keep an open mind and just think about this...

Peace, Quiet, Love, Tradition, All Natural, Tranquility and Appreciation

JUST SAYING...

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Date : Saturday 12 - 27 - 2014

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Lessons Learned

Year End Review

WOW... Yet another year has passed so fast. I just can't believe it. I was just getting over the "growing pains" of 2013, and now 2014 has shot by in a blink of and eye with unbelievable lessons learned... I will be yet another year older and still not having for filled my dreams (Not from lack of trying). What the hell am I doing wrong. I keep coming close and every time I do, I keep getting people yanking the carpet out from under me. That's it, I am NO longer allowing "ANYONE" to get close to me : EVER AGAIN ! This year has been a HUGE disappointment, with 1 set back after another and I am completely sick of it. I am always trying my best to play by the rules in life and still I continue to get FUCKED OVER and Back Stabbed time and time again.

An old acquaintance of mine (Michelle Miller) once taught me this... : If you continue to do the things that you have always done, You will continue to get the exact same results that you've always gotten. If you want different results, DO THINGS DIFFERENTLY !

Being the PROUD VIRGO that I am... I have always put others first before myself. I have always considered other peoples best interests before my own. Well, where has that ever gotten me ? RIGHT BACK TO SQUARE 1. Well, no more... 2014 privately, behind the scenes, was a year that I learned a lot about both myself, others around me and about the world that we live in today...

As a Result, Here are some hard lessons that I learned THE HARD WAY, here in 2014 that I will carry with me for the rest of my life (Not that 2013 was much different).

1. Stick to my personal values, no matter who it hurts or offends. Otherwise, I will be the one hurt and offended in the end. Usually more than others.

2. Never lend money to anyone for any reason. It only sets ME up to inherit someones else's debt and shortfalls, which become my shortfalls.

3. Never depend on other FOR ANYTHING. If I can't do something myself : FUCK IT ! Depending on others for ANYTHING only puts me at their mercy and usually for their own amusement !

4. Anyone can set goals but few can stick to them. Don't be afraid to say NO and PUSH others out of my way or I will be the one trampled on (Usually with egg all over my face).

5. Never allow my pity and dependency of others get in the way of my goals. Then I will become the one who is viewed with pity and become dependent on others.

6. Never be afraid to wipe the slate clean and start completely over. Continuing to beat the same dead rock will not move it or get me anywhere.

7. Believe little of what I see and less of what I hear. It usually is ALL BULLSHIT anyway and can only get ME caught up in others mess. Seriously : NO THANKS !

8. I learned that I can NEVER live up to other peoples expectations or personal image of me. It is a waste of time even trying because if I do, I will no longer be : ME ! Just be myself. Who ever likes me for me, COOL. Who ever don't or wants to "TRY" to change me : FUCK THEM ! Separate myself FAST, from those who seek to change me just to suit their own opinions of me.

9. Never again allow anyone to get too close to me. My father always said : "Those who are closest to you, are the ones who can hurt you the most" (and usually do). My father was a VERY WISE CHEROKEE !

10. Never lose sight of who I am and my personal goals just to please others in any way. If I have to change who I am just to make others happy, I DON'T NEED THEM IN MY LIFE !

It was a year of many ups and downs...

But HERE I STILL STAND.

Time to now : TRY AGAIN... HERE WE GO !

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Friday, October 17, 2014

One Step Closer

No one EVER said that working 2 jobs was easy However, it really "IS" PUSHING me closer to my dreams MUCH FASTER ! I am about to become successful. TRULY SUCCESSFUL. With every paycheck, I stash a little aside for the building blocks needed to get me to where I want to be in life. It's just a DAM GOOD FEELING now that I am getting much closer to realizing my dreams and showing the world what I am all about.

There is so much that I have secretly kept bottled up inside. There is so much that I have kept hidden, so that no one spoils my TRUE INNER CORE and deter my dreams. NOW, It is coming close to time for me to BREAK OUT. It is NOT FUN at all working 2 jobs. However, A Fox will do what a Fox gotta do.

I have been working dam hard and suffering a lot along the way. It's all about to pay off... FINALLY ! It's far too long over due too. I just hope that I have the patience it takes to stay calm while my star is rising. I know who's always been on my side. I also remember all those who has turned there backs on my (both past and present) Soon, Everyone will know my name and exactly who I am, TRULY ! As for right now, just know that I am stacking CA$H and doing what I gotta do. Let me just put it this way... Instead of buying a car, I am laying low now, but soon will rise far.

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Friday, October 10, 2014

God's NEWEST Angel

Everyone knows that my blog is a platform where I can express my TRUEST INNER FEELINGS to the world, Well..., I just received some news that has rocked me deeply. Today is a day that someone who is VERY DEAR to me is hurting, due to a great loss in her family.

Due to PRIVACY CONCERNS, I will not give any names, out of RESPECT for the family. However, her Beautiful Mother, has served her time here on this earth and has now been called back home to be with our Heavenly Father. As an Angel here on Earth, she has stood strong through the struggles of life. She has served as a teacher and protector to her family. She has been the backbone of her family while passing down the teachings and knowledge that has made her next generations great and strong while preserving her legacy, good family name and heritage.

GOD has now granted her the wings that she so richly deserves. She has now been elevated up to Heaven to receive GOD's blessings, praise and thanks. In this time of grieving, my deepest prayers and heart felt condolences go to her family and friends alike. If you know who this is, PLEASE SAY a prayer for her and her family. If you don't, just know that the world has lost a great Angelic Warrior. My heart goes out to her and I pray that her family stays strong and remembers the Great Warrior that is now an Angel in Heaven...

God's NEWEST Angel

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Monday, August 11, 2014

A Whole New Beginning...

For the past year and a half, I have been living in a total and complete nightmare. My secret pain is almost over. For the past year and a half, my life has been turned completely upside down. It's all due to my kids mom and her refusal to grow up and become a responsible adult and a proper parent, which left me and my kids extremely vulnerable and in a very long painful mess. I am now only 24 hours away from returning to Orlando, Florida, were I am going to put my every effort into rebuilding my life. She has also been successful in turning my own kids fully against me now. Therefore, Once I get my kids firmly planted and fully re-established, I will then begin the painful process of separating myself from the people who has hurt me the most : MY OWN FAMILY !

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Saturday, July 5, 2014

1 Year Delayed Post Project

Hello Everyone... I am conducting an experiment. A "Delayed Posting" ! Let me explain...

I am sitting here writing this blog 1 year ago... I am setting the posting date for exactly 1 year later. Today's date is July 5th, 2015... However, I am sitting here writing this blog on July 5th, 2014. By the time anyone sees this blog entry, it should be 1 year later. My experiment is to now, do a "1 year delayed blog". So that as each post pops up, I will get to see where my life was in comparison exactly 1 year before.

For example, what ever blog post you read from now on, was actually posted 1 year ago. Meaning, every time I post and write a blog entry, I will date it to post automatically on THAT DATE, 1 YEAR LATER... A post I write on July 6th, 2014, will be dated to automatically post on July 6th, 2015. Get it ? 1 year delayed posts. I love the idea of this experiment. It will also give me, myself, a good opportunity to reflect on my own personal growth.

OK, so here we go... My blog will now become a 1 year delayed blog and each post you see and read from now on was actually done EXACTLY 1 year prior on that EXACT date ! So, from 2014 to 2015....... See you all 1 year in the future...

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Friday, July 4, 2014

Wisdom For You Ladies

This is just a little "Real World Wisdom" for you overly emotional, Irrational, Hormonal, NON-Thinking and overly judgmental Women out there... Oh and DON'T get mad, I am just speaking THE PLAIN TRUTH ! So if you can't keep your hormones and emotions in check, STAY SINGLE and KEEP IT MOVIN SWEETY... With that being said, Let me now drop just a little :

"Real World Knowledge"...

If You actually "THINK" that Ignoring your man and hanging up on him really hurts him in any way ? Think AGAIN STUPID girl ! You're REALLY just dropping the ball... The exact same ball that the next girl is about to pick right up on FAST, and just as soon as you are out of sight. So, EGG on "YOUR" face STUPID GIRL ! Now just Ask yourself, Is simply being mad at your man really worth ignoring him and turning your back to him when things are a little tough ? Are you NOT strong enough to STAND BY YOUR MAN ? Well guess what : When "YOU" turn your back on him, The next girl comes right along and VERY QUICKLY says to him : I WILL BE THERE FOR YOU BABY, IF SHE WON'T pay you attention anymore ! I won't turn MY back on YOU like "SHE DID"... BIG EGG ON YOUR FACE !

Some Women are just so DAM STUPID ! You get so foolishly mad at your man over small things, then you just turn your back on him and walk away from him.

Well... Guess what's waiting for him RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER...

And then right down the street, there's this girl :

So Ladies, Please look in the mirror and ask yourself this : You may be mad at your man, but is it really worth turning your back on him and hanging up on him over ?

You STILL NOT Sure ? You "STILL" DON'T GET IT ? Well then, The next time you turn your back on your man or hang up the phone on him repeatedly or ignore him and his calls.. Just remember, he could always run into other women like this :

DON'T TURN YOUR BACK ON YOUR MAN and when he calls, ANSWER or DON'T CRY OVER YOUR DAM LOSS DUMMY.

ENOUGH SAID !

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Friday, June 27, 2014

Letter To GOD

Dear GOD,

I know that you are the creator, the almighty. The end all, be all. I know that you have a reason and a purpose for everything in life and beyond. So, I have a few questions that has been on my mind, and I hope that you wouldn't mind sharing a small piece of your infinite wisdom with me.

1. Why do we humans all grow old and ultimately expire ? Why can't we just exist without death ?

2. If you are known to be a "Forgiving" GOD, why won't you forgive Lucifer and reunite the universe once and for all ?

3. If your message is 1 of Love, Peace, Forgiveness, non violence and Humanity, Why is there so much HATE, VIOLENCE and KILLING world wide all in your Holy name and in the name of your Holy Bible ?

4. If The LGBT Community and citizens are all about Love, Peace and Unity, why is there so much HATE Directed towards them ?

5. Why are there so many different languages on this earth ? Why can't we all speak the same language and remove the barriers that keep us all separate ?

6. Why were we humans NOT born with wings so that we could freely fly any NOT need machines to travel and freely move about ?

7. If we humans we created in YOUR image, why do we all have different colors and sizes ?

8. Why do we humans Thirst, Tire, Hunger and Hurt ?

9. If you are a "Forgiving" GOD, why is it believed that we humans will parish in HELL after death for our sins ?

10. Why do you forbid us to do things and even call them "SINS", yet you give us FREE WILL ?

11. Why are we NOT given the choice of being born in the gender body that we prefer, since you give us so much FREE WILL ?

12. Why was I born in a male body, instead of the Beautiful Female body that I know I should have had from the beginning ?

13. If Pain during birth and Monthly periods were the punishment for Eve and her sin, why do all women of the world have to pay for HER sins as their own.

14. If you are the Creator and the Almighty and no one or nothing can stand against you, why do you allow evil, war, killing and demons to exist ?

15. Why do you give us humans urges and desires, yet tell us to resist it ? Why even allow us to have the things that you forbid ?

16. If you are our creator and we are all your children, why are we not allowed to speak directly with you ?

17. Why do we need to PROVE ourselves "Worthy" of being in your kingdom of Heaven when YOU are the 1 who created us to begin with ?

18. Why do we have to wear clothes to cover our Beautiful naked bodies that you YOURSELF created to begin with ?

19. If we humans were created in your image, why are we ashamed of our bodies ? Do you take that as an insult and think we are ashamed of YOU since we look exactly like you ?

20. If we can change the color of our hair, our nails and make many other changes to our physical bodies and it is viewed as "Acceptable" and NOT sinful, why can't we change the gender of our body and live freely without fear of violence and rejection ?

21. Why do we have to Worship and go through your son Jesus to get to you ?

22. WHY are we NOT able to travel through time ?

23. Why don't you speak directly to us and show us your TRUE face ?

I mean NO DISRESPECT to you Lord GOD. These are just a few of the many other questions that run through my head. I know that YOU have your reasons for everything. You have given us instincts, free will, desires and needs. I just ask for wisdom, answers, guidance and a higher understanding.

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

Native Fire Star

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Friday, June 20, 2014

Biblical Issues

Let me start by saying that I "DO" believe in GOD. No If's, And's or But's : I just "DO" ! Now that I have gotten THAT out the way... I have a big problem with The Bible. Specifically, The Ten Commandments and The Seven Deadly Sins. First, Lets Start with :

      1. Saying "NO OTHER" GODS before me, first acknowledges that, there are in fact "OTHERS"... So, why don't we know more about them ? Who they are ? Why are we NOT allowed to follow "THEM" instead, by our own free choice and free will ? Their names and their purpose and positions in the universe ? Worship no other GODS... Means that we don't even know the difference from one or another... WTF ?

      2. Does this mean that anyone with a Tattoo will parish in the flames of hell ? Are tattoo's sinful ? Body desecration... It's OUR body so why take away our FREEDOM of choice ? Therefore, do we NOT have any freedom after all ? Also, If I were to Marry a woman with a tattoo, will I parish as well (guilt by association) ?

      3. Oh GOD...! First of all, NO HUMAN even knows the TRUE NAME OF GOD ! Some think they know but let's face it : "GOD" is a Title, NOT a name ! Like "President" is a Title and "BUSH" is a Proper name. So when someone says : OH GOD ! That doesn't count because it is a title, NOT A PROPER NAME ! Now, if someone says : Oh "JESUS" or "JESUS CHRIST"... that is a total different story...

      4. I remember this day... Most of us just call it "Sunday" ! It is commonly used for Laundry, Housework, getting ready for Monday morning work or school, spending time with relatives and friends and also UNLIKE ME, spend time with someone you love (if you are lucky enough to have such a person in your life)...? So, to keep this day Holy...? You be the judge, based on your own life arrangement and congestion.

      5. Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother ! Really ? Some of you (My Readers) were blessed with really super cool parents. YOU ARE VERY LUCKY. So, YOU ARE EXCLUDED FROM THIS ONE, so skip it and go to # 6...

      So, what if your parents never honored YOU ? What if you had / have ROTTEN PARENTS ? What if you have / had real SUCK ASS Parents ? Hell..., if you were adopted or abandoned, you may not even know who your parents are ! You know, the people who just dumped you off somewhere like last weeks trash and forgot about your ass. My point : Why should our parents burden fall on OUR SHOULDERS ? We didn't even ask to be born in the first place so why honor people who may not even give a shit about you and may also consider you as the 1 mistake that they made and feel much regret because of you or maybe they blame "YOU" for ruining "THEIR" LIFE !

      Like me, if you choose to be a Good Parent, I applaud you. However, you have NO CONTROL over who YOUR PARENTS ARE / WERE ! That's their problem, not yours, because they created you, you didn't create them right ? So, How the hell can you honor someone who don't or didn't honor you or even give 2 shits about you ? I THINK NOT !

      6. Thou shall NOT KILL ! Really ? Let a mother fucker touch your daughter or son and see if you care about killing his ass ? I don't think so... Let some bastard come alone and RAPE and BEAT YOUR WIFE OR SISTER OR YOUR MOTHER and see if you think twice about KILLING HIS ASS !

      Also, if someone puts you in a situation where you are forced to defend yourself or even use deadly force, do you think you would even hesitate about killing someone ? REALLY ? I don't think so ! This is REAL LIFE and the world that we live in today has DRASTICALLY changed from the time of the Bible's creation, That's all I will say on that. YOU BE THE JUDGE !

      7. Thou Shalt NOT commit ADULTERY... OK, I will give you this one. I agree with this one. The old saying is : Do unto others as you will have them to DO UNTO "YOU" ! RIGHT ? Besides, If you don't TRULY Love a person and you DON'T want to spend the REST of your natural life with that 1 person, YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE MARRIED THAT PERSON.

      Also, If the Love is gone and the Marriage is over, END it properly and FULLY "BEFORE" moving on with the next person. ONLY be with 1 person at a time. Nothing else is fair to your partner or yourself.. Anything else is on YOUR ASS ! Ask yourself 1 question : Is it worth it...?

8. I always say, Why ask who own's something or who does "THAT" belong too ? You don't NEED to know ! The fact is : If something is "NOT" yours, leave it alone dumb ass ! Don't put your hands on something JUST BECAUSE you don't know who it belongs too. JUST KNOW THAT IT's NOT YOURS ! That "ALL" you need to know. So, YES, I "DO" AGREE with this commandment ! No question and enough said...

9. I live by several personal rules in life. 1 of them is : If you gotta lie about something, it's better just to keep your dam mouth shut and NOT say anything at all - or - just say "No Comment". If you really feel the need to lie about something, just walk away and save your face and credibility... You know what they say, it takes a bigger lie to cover up the last one you told. You will just end up looking like 1 big DUMB ASS ! So if you must be false, just SHUT THE FUCK UP or you just might GET FUCKED UP ! I agree with : Bare NO False Witness...

10. SEE my answer for number 8. Basically... SAME THING !

In short, While I "DO" believe in GOD, The Creator HIMSELF, I hold very little validity in today's world to a man made book called :

Coming up on my NEXT Blog entry is :

The 7 Deadly Sins

A continuation of this entry (Part 2)

Live your Dreams and ALWAYS : Reach for The Stars...

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Monday, June 16, 2014

WWW : White World Walmart

I want to tell you all a story about How RACIST WALMART is and a WHITE WALMART RACIST named "ED" ! Let me tell you a little story about "ME", working for :

"White World Walmart" !

Years ago... I used to work at Walmart, briefly. The store I worked at was located in Hunt Valley, Maryland. Since that time, That store is NOW relocated to Cockeysville, Maryland, on York Road (Right down the street from where it used to be). I was a NEW employee at the original store. I was totally green. I was young. I was so proud of my new job and I actually had high hopes for that experience (stupid me, I know). I was assigned to the Sporting Goods section. There, I stocked merchandise and served customers. I met a lot of really nice cool people too. It was pretty sweet, even for that "ULTRA WHITE" area.

However... I had a Department manager / supervisor named "ED". He made it TRULY crystal clear right from the start of DAY 1, that this Racist White Redneck BASTARD definitely did not like me at all. Apparently, I just didn't "FIT" in and I was NOT welcome there at all... He made dam sure that I knew it too. He didn't know me or anything about me, other than the fact that I was NOT WHITE like HE was. Yet, he proceeded to talk DOWN to me like the "Little Slave Boy". I was immediately VERY uncomfortable. Still, I was happy to be there. I just figured that I was new and needed to prove myself. So, I thought... OK, I will take my lumps and eventually warm up to this guy or just change to another area / department. Sounds pretty simple, right ? NO WAY... Back in those days (and still pretty much today as well), in that area (Upper Baltimore County), ULTRA WHITE PEOPLE RULED THE LAND. If you wasn't WHITE, You wasn't Right... Get me !

      Well, as all of you (my readers) know... My first (and ONLY) Love is music. Well... One day, I was at work. I was on the floor and I was told by ED to simply straighten up the shelves, face up everything and make our area look "Pretty". I was like : Ok cool, no problem. So, I am doing my job and I had my section looking "Way Cool". Being a new employee, I was softly singing to myself, passing the time. Basically, "Whistling while I worked". The day was going well, until... Ed, called me over to talk to him. I was totally unaware of what was to SHOCKINGLY happen next... He dropped a bomb on me. He told me that I should punch out and go home ! I was like huh ? I just got here. What's wrong I asked him ? He said, : See that lady right there (Pointing to a middle aged WHITE Woman). I said yeah, what about her...?

      He said, I offended her and that I was "Offensive" to our Walmart guests. I was like huh ? But, I didn't do anything. I was just fixing and cleaning the shelves like you asked me too and I was just "Whistling while I worked". What did I do wrong ? He just told me that I should punch out and leave the store immediately. I was really hurt, confused and completely disoriented. Well, as I walked away, the middle aged WHITE lady looked at me with a very dirty look and giving me a weird and eerie smile. I should have went to talk with the store manager to fight it. However, I was young and Naive, So, I just punched out and walked out the store. I knew that in those days, you don't fight "The White". Especially since I was "Out of my element".

I called the store to talk to ED the very next day to inquire about my next scheduled day of work. I was told by ED, My department manager, NOT to report to work and that I was taken off the schedule. I was "Let Go". I asked "Why" ? I was confused and hurt, because I didn't do anything wrong ! When I went to the store to pick up my paycheck that Friday, I was told that I was offensive to customers and that I was BARRED FOR LIFE from "EVER" working for WALMART again. My heart was racing and my head was spinning so hard, that it took me over a week later to really calm myself down enough to think clearly and realize that I had been a victim of RACISM ! Until this day I still can NOT even apply at any Walmart store (I know, I tried, in 3 different states).

I have since contacted that store several times over the years to clear the matter up and I also contacted the main Walmart Corp. to try to get my record clear and to "RIGHT THIS WRONG" to, me. Over the years I have made several attempts to "CLEAR MY GOOD NAME" ! I have been given 1 cheap excuse after another, Ignored flat and even told that basically "It's too late, I am NOT Welcome back to Walmart" !